I hate New Years’ resolutions. They seem trite. Like abstract goals without purpose. Lose 10 pounds. Read a book a month. Save $1,000. These are good goals to have but if they aren’t the means to a greater end, what’s the point? Weight loss in pursuit of better health; reading in pursuit of educating one’s self; and saving money in pursuit of financial independence—these are the kinds of resolutions that can meaningfully change one’s life. Resolutions that are nothing more than arbitrary numbers are superficial goals that end up becoming self-defeating by the time February rolls around.

This is why I like setting a New Years’ theme. A theme for the new year is an intention and that intention helps guide goal setting.

So what is the theme of 2018 you ask?

Own it.

I struggle with not living up to my values, not appreciating my self-worth, wasting time, and not making a dent in getting out of debt. All these things impact me emotionally, mentally, and professionally. So in 2018 I am going to take ownership of my life, flaws included.

Owning my Worth

This is a tough one to talk about publicly. I don’t see myself as valuable and never really have. I’ve never felt smart enough, funny enough, athletic enough, attractive enough…you get my point. I’ve always had this chip on my shoulder that I need to prove I’m enough.

That I need to prove I’m enough to everyone but myself.

This is why I overdid it in high school and college, academically speaking. Why I run marathons. Why I travel incessantly to the Middle East. I joke that I’m a masochist, and in some ways I am, but really I’m chasing approval from others to give value to my self-worth.

I’ve now reached the point where I’ve burned myself out. As I see it there are two options before me: continue to fight myself or own that this is it; I am me, baggage and all.

One of the ways I am going to try to do this is by synergizing my physical fitness journey with my “owning my worth” journey. These things are more or less intertwined anyways. But really gym time is me time. It’s time I carve out of my day to work on myself. Previously I’ve picked up physical fitness routines to appease others—attract a male partner; look sexy in a bikini; wear an outfit better than a female peer; etc. Again that goes back to me trying to prove something to other people.

Instead of that mindset, I’m going to shift gears a bit. Gym time will now be time for me to define my worth to myself. Test myself to see what I can do for myself rather than what I want to do for others. To declutter my brain and give myself an hour everyday to mentally connect with my body.

This is so much more than trying to lose 10 pounds. It’s no longer giving a shit about what I think other people think about me. (Spoiler alert: I’m my own worst critic). It’s owning myself for who I am. And that is what I think will set me up for success in 2018.

Owning my Values

I talk the talk but man do I suck at walking the walk. Over the last five years I’ve discovered plant based eating, minimalism, and zero waste living. These three things are becoming the three fundamental pillars that define me. But I don’t always live out these values—and that’s a problem.

I complain about getting sick or my psoriasis flare-ups but when I think about making a dietary change to ameliorate those problems, I stop at the threshold of action. Sure I’ve been a vegetarian since before vegetarianism was in vogue, but I still poison my body. I’m addicted to sugar and have no concept of portion control, especially when it comes to pasta. I would eat Shake Shack daily if my budget could afford it.

In 2018 I want to learn to properly fuel and heal my body. I want to cut my sugar addiction once and for all. I want to do this by truly eating a plant based diet. This means no more Icelandic yogurt, breakfast omelets, or burrata filled ravioli. 2018 will be the year where I experiment more in the kitchen and make this commitment a priority in my life.

Minimalism and zero waste living are also important to me. I talk about owning less and producing less waste but I still go out and buy a bunch of new crap I don’t need with post-consumer materials that end up going to the landfill. I’m putting a kibosh on this once and for all. 2018 will be the year of buying nothing new (with a few exceptions). Instead of rushing to the store to get something new, I want to spend 2018 recalibrating my needs versus my wants while evaluating how those needs and wants impact my life and the environment.

Owning my Debt

This one is more or less self-explanatory. Two years ago I built a giant “Debt Crush” wall in my apartment. On that wall I essentially built a timeline of how I wanted to pay off my debt. Let’s just say that time progressed while my Debt Crush did not…

As long as I am indebted to a bank—or the Department of Education—I am indentured to a cubicle farm. There is literally a desk with my name on it that I have to park my butt at for 40 hours a week. As long as I have debt my time is not my own. As long as I am employed to a corporation, my passion to explore the world is limited by the amount of PTO I have to my name. And as long as I have debt, my mind is cluttered with trying to devise ways to get out of debt.

I want to reclaim my life and the only way to do that is to become financially independent. To do so, I must first dig myself out of debt.

I’m going to do this by first living within my actual means instead of what I think my means should be. No more dine-in restaurants, almond milk lattes, concerts, or boutique fitness classes. This will be the year of NO! so next year can be the a year of yes.

Owning my Time

I waste so much time. Time scrolling through Instagram. Time watching useless shows on Netflix. Time planning and replanning my monthly budget. Time thinking about doing something but not actually doing anything.

Time is a finite resource that is so precious yet so easily wasted. In 2018 I want to reclaim my time. Between developing business ideas to providing thoughtful pieces on this blog, I’ve come to realize I don’t have spare time to waste.

I’m going to do this by structuring my days. Instead of mindlessly scrolling through Instagram when I’m bored, I’m going to set aside time in the day to review my social media accounts just as I do with email. Instead of entitling myself to Netflix every evening when I come home from work, I am going to privilege myself Netflix, mostly on the weekends. I’m also going to try to tighten up inefficiencies with my commute. I can’t change the amount of time I sit in traffic, but I can make it more productive. This means listening to audio books or edifying podcasts on the way home from work instead of Taylor Swift.

There are 365 days ahead of us in 2018. I want to own every single one of those days and know that they mattered. I don’t want to spend next New Year’s Eve wondering where the last year went.

2018 is going to be a year I own. It’s not going to get away from me like every other year. I’m not going to take it for granted.

2018, I’m coming for you.